He’s WALKING. And CLIMBING.
Oh, man, I’m so not ready for this.
I changed my mind – I want a puppy, instead!
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Oh, Den (Ok, den, der Ben)
Let’s play the movie quote game! Name that movie! For bonus points, give me character names, an essay on their beliefs on green living, and a recipe for your favorite dessert!
1. If you have an ass, I’ll kick it!
2. It’s a break-dancing stripper emergency!
3. “But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun.” “And his shenanigans are cruel and tragic.”
4. It’s evil. It’s diabolical. It’s lemon-scented. This Plan Z can’t possibly fail! Spongebob Squarepants, the Movie – guessed by Emily
I’ll give you a hint – all of these are things I would NEVER HAVE WATCHED. And then? I met Brandus. And he watches them over and over and over and then I find myself laughing and quoting and omgmylife, y’all. *facepalm*
The rest are just for fun.
5. It is not the spoon that bends. It is only yourself. The Matrix – guessed by Shan
6. We’re going to die and I’m wearing my mother’s underwear! Grease 2 – guessed by Mel
7. I think being a good father is keeping the mother happy so she doesn’t drive the kids crazy. Look Who’s Talking – guessed by Emily
8. ALL RIGHT, I AM! I’M SHOUTING, I’M SHOUTING, I’M SHOUT…! *thunk*
9. You’re loose in the house all the time and I sleep just fine!
10. Right now, as we speak, your daughter has entered a hotbed of moral… turpentine.
Also, according to IMDB, “High School Musical” had the working title of “Grease 3.” MY BRAIN, IT BLEEDS.
Posted in geek, mawwiage
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Shake Your Money Maker
1. I have a Thing about my belly button. I was very anxious during pregnancy. The idea of it “popping” from an innie to an outie freaked me out completely. Its not the look of it – I was very freaked out about how it would feel if it brushed against my clothes. Or my hand. Im totally giving myself the heebie jeebies right now.
The child stuck his finger in my belly button the other day. I think I scared him when I yelped.
2. I normally wake up wearing less clothes than I fell asleep in. And no, it’s not Brandus molesting me in my sleep. He doesnt care if Im wearing socks or not.
I go to bed in a tshirt, socks, and pj pants. I wake up in a shirt. Sometimes socks and pants end up beside the bed. Sometimes they’re under my pillow.
3. There is a large variety of food that I wont eat because I dont like how it feels in my mouth. Seafood. Mushrooms. Onions. Pureed anything.
I can trace my onion issues back to MacDonald’s hamburgers. As a kid, I would always order a plain hamburger, and they used those little chopped onions that got everywhere, and one or two or fifteen hundred always ended up on the burger, leaving me to squish down into it and do the dance of revulsion. Gag.
4. I never plucked my eyebrows until the last year or so. I had never heard of something so ridiculous.
Even now, I only do it when Im bored, just out of the shower, and trying to put off leaving the bathroom – because when I do, a spider monkey follows me around and tries to eat off my plate and snatches keys off my keyboard and chases the cats until they escape.
5. A few months ago, one of my friends came over to my house while I was still in my pajamas. “OOOH!” I said, “You’ve got to see my underpants!”
And yes, I dropped trou.
She loved the undies. She should, they have a dinosaur on them and the butt says RROWR.
Brandus thought it was awesome.
Bounce
Im working on a sewing project of a native shirt for myself, so hopefully I can replicate it for my sister, later.* So, Ive been taking my own measurements to work with. Which is hilarious, because there is no pattern for this, and Im the least spatial person ever.
Anyway, so I go to take measurements yesterday, even though I had measured myself two weeks or so beforehand, just to make sure nothing had changed too much, as Ive also lost a few pounds.
Ooh, an inch off the hips – very nice.
A half inch off the waist? Good stuff.
AN INCH AND A HALF OFF THE BUST.
An inch and a half of boobs! Gone!
Im trying to remember when I measured myself both times, and if it had been a while since I fed the kid or if I had just pumped or whatever, but I cant get over it.
Geeze. Are they really that big that I can lose an inch and a half off of them and not notice in the slightest?
*Natalie, pocket or no pocket? Hood or no hood? These are the things I need to know.
A Letter
Dear March,
You know, we kinda had a bad February. Make that, we had a really bad February.
I know that you and I are going to get along just fine. You’re going to be much nicer than that last nasty month, aren’t you?
I mean, I know we’re not going to have to worry about kidney stones, or MRSA, or pneumonia, or rabies scares*.
We’re not going to have to rush to Anchorage to go to the doctor. Not any of us.
I know you wouldnt anything like that to us, March. I just know it. I can feel that you’re going to take very good care of us.
Right, March?
Right?
Sincerely,
alianora
*Please, Im begging you, just don’t ask.