2 and a half, going on hilarious

Voldemort has hit the imagination stage and the whiny stage, all in conjunction with each other. I dont so much care for the whining, but the imagination plus his ability to deliver bizarre lines with a straight face means he is bound to be in trouble in school a lot.

My personal favorite happened just yesterday. I came in to pick him up from daycare to see him poking one of the girls with a wooden spoon as she spun around on this bouncy zebra thing.
“Kiddo, what are you doing?”
“I’m ‘tagonizing Payton!”

Payton is the girl he identifies as his girlfriend. We don’t know why, as we’ve never encouraged it, and daycare says they don’t talk about it. This is also the girl with whom my child has a “special” relationship. Daycare identifies it as “a married couple in the middle of a nasty divorce.”

Ah, the sweet smell of young love.

Posted in voldemort | Tagged | 1 Comment

Pants Optional

My child has decided, after a discussion with his father, who was trying to get him to stop crying and crying and crying for no apparent reason, that this year, we shall celebrate Hanukkah. This seems like a downright swell idea to me, so we’re going with it. The fact that we aren’t Jewish doesn’t matter all that much, does it?

We’ll grab a Menorah, light some candles, and have 8 days of presents. I like that better anyway.

It might help me deal with the sheer utter stupid that I ran into today. So, I pass my boss in the hall twice today, smile as she passes, I think one time I even said ‘Hi,’ once. She doesnt so much as glance my way. Seriously, not a flicker. Not a nod. Nothing.

Um. I figured maybe she was just…distracted. So i go about my day, get my kids on the bus with no major drama…and when I get home, Brandus says, “Um..”

“Yes?”

“My principal pulled me aside today, and said I should have a talk with you.”

“….Uh…..why?”

“She wants to know what you did to get on your principal’s bad side, and that you better kiss ass FAST to get on her good side.”

Let me rephrase this whole conversation. Brandus was pulled aside, BY HIS PRINCIPAL, to warn me I needed to get on MY PRINCIPAL’S good side.

She’s talking shit about me, people. TO OTHER PRINCIPALS. And let us review – what exactly have i done so wrong?

1. I didnt check in when I went on a home visit that lasted longer than usual, leading me to be, in her eyes, an hour late returning to the school. And leaving my room a mess…even though they hadn’t delivered my furniture until we had already left for the home visit, and we didn’t KNOW the room was a mess.

2. My lesson plans printed off strangely, cutting off a sliver of the letters down one side.

THESE ARE THE ONLY THINGS I KNOW I’VE DONE WRONG. Every single freaking thing she has told me to do, we have done. And we have hopped to every single time she has said hop.

I can’t even hate her. She’s too fucking ridiculous.

Posted in teach me, voldemort | Tagged | 2 Comments

Please, Sir, May I Have Another?

I got called down to the office this morning and told to reprint my weekly lesson plans.

My offense? The first letters on the right hand side were cut off. Not the whole letter, just a tiny fraction. The word could still easily be read.

I was given a stern look, and told not to let this happen again.

SERIOUSLY?

Posted in teach me | 2 Comments

Sometimes My Fandom Life Overtakes My Real Life

I have thoughts to share.

An entire story about the sheer ridiculousness that I encountered one day while picking up Voldemort from daycare, when the assistant manager told me, giggling and almost blushing, that she had never known another 2 year old who uses anatomically correct terms for his genitalia.

Because “wee wee” and “pee pee” are so much more appropriate then “penis,” I guess.

More insane stories about my job and the micromanaging, which has now progressed to a degree of inanity where the work room is no longer available to the teaching public of the school. It is kept locked, and all things which must be photocopied, cut, laminated, or die cut must be submitted to the office at least 2 weeks before it is needed.

No, Im really not kidding. Teachers and TAs are no longer allowed to set foot in the workroom.

Stories about the fact my sister is coming to visit tomorrow, and she’s making Indian food, and we’re trying to plot out the best way to make a cake that looks like brains so we can pretend to be zombies.

Instead, I leave you with the song that has been stuck in my head for the past week. It’s a damned addicting vid, too. It’s fairly obvious the guys who dressed them were on crack. I’m very fond of the girl whose hair sticks straight up.

Posted in fandom, geek, she who bakes, teach me, voldemort, you and your vagina | Tagged | Comments Off on Sometimes My Fandom Life Overtakes My Real Life

Make This: Butterball Soup

Butterball soup is one of my very favorite things in the entire whole world. Seriously.

Now, my husband is one of “those” cooks. The ones who don’t use a recipe or measure things and just throw stuff in and see what happens. And it turns out amazing. But never the same way twice. So, attempting to give a recipe for butterball soup is a little tricky, but I’m going to try.

First things first: this soup is not for the faint of heart. It is also not for the weak hearted, because the word BUTTER is featured predominantly in the title for a reason.

This comes with photos, because it’s easier to see then it is to fully explain, sometimes. Also, the amount of soup we make at one time is hilarious. We eat it until we’re out of butterballs. Then we make more of those, and eat it until the broth is all gone. Then we make more broth. So, sometimes, this is the never ending soup, and we make a huge pot of it for the three of us. So, adjust amounts as you see fit. Or go for it, make the huge pot, and see what happens.

Basic ingredient list:
veggies of whatever sort – celery and carrots and garlic are required, but throw in whatever else you’ve got
bullion – chicken or veggie
loaf of bread – sourdough is best, italian is fine, sandwich loaf works if you’ve got nothing else
eggs – two or three
small shaped pasta
parm cheese
mozzarella cheese
butter – and a lot of it

To start: obtain bigass pot. Add heart attack worthy glob of butter.

Chop/dice/cut up veggies. Really, it doesn’t matter how – here’s the food processor version. Carrots, celery and garlic are required, but anything else is fine, really. We’ve even done artichoke hearts when we didn’t have anything else. I wouldn’t suggest a lot of a strong tasting veggies, though.

Saute the veggies til translucent. Brandus also throws in a couple of chicken breasts at this point – they aren’t necessary, as we’ve done it plenty of times without it. We don’t even eat the chicken in it – Brandus due to vegetarianism, and me due to not liking chicken in butterball soup. We pull it out and use it in something else, so no worries if you don’t want to add it.

Add bullion and water to pot to make a fuck ton of broth. Seriously, this jar was FULL when we started. The broth for butterball soup needs to be a very strong, rich, tangy broth. We use this kind of bullion, as it’s very yummy, and very strong.

I wasn’t kidding about a lot of broth.

At this point, turn the heat up and let it simmer. You’ve got the fuck ton of broth, so this will take a while. That’s ok, you have something else to do.

Take your loaf and bread and tear it up into small chunks. Dump some parm cheese in there on top of it. Add spices if you want – sometimes we add bits of the carrots and celery in there, too. Yummy.

Melt more butter – one loaf of regular sized French bread equals about a stick a butter. Beat in two or three eggs into the butter. Pour over the top of the bread chunks.

Remove rings, stick your hands in the bread and butter mess, and squish to a uniform consistency.

Add in your small shaped pasta to the broth – not a ton, maybe a fourth of the box. You want to add this now, as you don’t want the pasta to get overcooked.

Back to your bread and butter mess. Pinch of a chunk and make a ball out of it. Add more butter or more bread if you can’t make a ball. It needs to be tightly packed – here’s one in Brandus’ hand to help you get an idea of size. No bigger then 2 inches, really.

Feel free to enlist help.

Make all the butterballs, and drop them in the soup. They’ll sink immediately, which is what you want.

The butterballs will float when they’re done.

Serve – 3 or 4 butterballs, some pasta and veggies and broth, and sprinkle with mozzarella. YUM.

If you make it, let me know. I’m curious to know what you think!

Posted in she who bakes | 2 Comments